What Is Marriage? Part 2

The following is wording for the “Oneness Covenant” —distributed by Family Life TodayFamilylife.com, which defines what they believe to be what God asks of us as we marry. This Covenant Contract is signed by the husband and wife and witnesses. It says:
“In consideration of God’s purposes for marriage as set forth below, we hereby agree to the following commitment:
• Whereas, our holy union is a state of fellowship that can be maintained only by mutual submission to the control and power of the Holy Spirit by faith;
• Our holy union is a trinity: husband, wife, and Jesus Christ;
• Our holy union affects God’s reputation;
• Our holy union is an acceptable offering to God, performed on our part by the exercising of faith in Him;
• God uses our holy union as a strategic battle formation in His spiritual warfare with the prince of this world, Satan, and his fallen angels;
• God has established our holy union for His purposes; that is to:
— Mirror His image — Mutually complete one another — Multiply a godly heritage
• God has outlined a blueprint for accomplishing oneness in our holy union; that is to:
— Receive one another as God’s personal provision
— Establish a new independent unit as a couple
— Establish an inseparable bond of commitment to one another
— Establish personal sexual intimacy with one another
— Establish complete transparency by good communication with one another
— Establish appropriate role responsibilities
Now, therefore, be it resolved that we, the undersigned couple, in light of the above truths, forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead and with the intent of allowing God to make our marriage all He wants it to be, do hereby reaffirm our vows of holy matrimony to love, honor, and establish oneness whether in sickness or in health, in poverty or in wealth, until death do us part. Amen.

Legally, marriage is a contract with certain rights and responsibilities. But we must distinguish between legal marriage and covenant marriage. In a legal marriage, if one party does not live up to the contract, then legal actions force them to do so or to end the marriage with an equitable settlement. A society could not exist without laws regulating marriage relationships, so in this sense, marriage is a contract. For a Christian, however, marriage is more; it is a covenant.
Contracts are important —The problem arises when we come to view our marriage only as a contract or a series of contracts. When this happens, we have become totally secular in our thinking and have abandoned the biblical view of marriage. The Bible views marriage ultimately as a covenant although contracts may be an important part of carrying out our covenant.
Contract Characteristics: There are five general characteristics of contracts.
1. Contracts are most often made for a limited period of time.
2. Contracts most often deal with specific actions.
3. Contracts are based on an “If… Then…” mentality.
4. Contracts are motivated by the desire to get something we want.
5. Contracts are sometimes unspoken and implicit.

While marriage is a legal contract to be honored, and informal contracts within marriage often help us effectively use our differing skills to our mutual benefit, Christian marriage is much more than a contract. This “much more” is to be discovered in the word covenant.

Why the term covenant marriage? Because it most clearly denotes the uniqueness of Christian marriage. Covenant is a biblical term. God is a covenant-making God.
(The following are some scriptures that deal with covenants in Scripture: Genesis 6:18; Genesis 17:3-8; Exodus 19:3-6; 2 Samuel 7:12-29; Jeremiah 31; Ezekiel 37; Hosea 2; Matthew 26:28; Luke 22:20;2 Corinthians 3:6; Galatians 3:15; Hebrews 7:22; Hebrews 8:6; Hebrews 13:20; 1 Samuel 18:1-3;Ruth 1:16-17; Proverbs 2:16-7; Ezekiel 16:8; Malachi 2:14- 16; Matthew 19:4-9.)

Covenant Characteristics:
A covenant, like a contract, is an agreement made between two or more persons, but the nature of the agreement is quite different.

5 characteristics of a covenant relationship:
1. Covenants are initiated for the benefit of the other person.
2. In covenant relationships, people make unconditional promises.
3. Covenant relationships are based on steadfast love.
4. Covenant relationships view commitments as permanent.
5. Covenant relationships require confrontation and forgiveness.

“Marriage is a God-planned creation, individually patterned and woven together to bring happiness and warmth to men and women —and joy and glory to the Creator.”(Shirley Cook from The Marriage Puzzle)
Did you catch those two words: planned and patterned? Planned: The dictionary says a plan is a “detailed method for the accomplishment of an object; a proposed project or goal.”
Patterned: is “an ideal worthy of imitation —a model; a sample.” Plans and patterns are so necessary. But we come to God, the all-important ingredient of marriage. He is the permanent glue that bonds the pieces of the picture puzzle together. After all, marriage is God’s idea from the beginning, all the way through the middle, right to the end. (Shirley Cook from The Marriage Puzzle )