Quotes on "Preparing for Marriage"

Now is the time to learn how to argue constructively before you have children. (Cindy Wright)

• We must remember that we’re not teaching skills to equip me to get what I want and you to get what you want. Instead we must focus on teaching skills that will equip us to keep our relationship, our “us-ness”, and our marriage alive. (Terry Hargrave, The Essential Humility of Marriage)

• Taking time to develop the healthiest communication skills you can at this stage can save you much heartache in future stages that are even more stressful. Couples are often very good at both talking and listening during dating. This open and honest sharing is how you became so close and what made you feel you knew each other so well. You took time to really listen to each other and gave each other your undivided attention on a regular basis.

Once married, these skills (like many of the healthy skills of dating) seem to get lost in the shuffle of daily events. The time you have available is less and less as the children arrive. So take advantage of the fact that during this stage there is more time for the two of you to communicate and grow closer. Use the time available in this stage to develop the best communication habits possible, which will help you make it through to that last stage, when once again you’ll find that you have more time for each other.